Saturday, December 16, 2006

Saturday Funnies




Why I fired my Secretary......
Last week was my birthday and I didnt feel very well waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, Happy Birthday, and possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone Happy Birthday"
I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! " It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go !"
We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind ?" She said ,"Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, " Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back."
"Ok." I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ... Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".
And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Naked.

12 comments:

Micki said...

...the dangers of inflated expectations!

Micki said...

Will someone explain this to me? Why is it called a stealth bomber when people can see it and hear it?

That just seems to stupid to me.

Micki said...

Not so funny...bush told People magazine: "I must tell you, I'm sleeping a lot better than people would assume."

I read that sociopaths sleep well.

DEN said...

How did you fare in the storm up there? Big mess from the info on TV.

DEN said...

Stealth refers to the invisibility on radar, not literally invisible.

Silly!

Micki said...

I was being silly.

We're okay in this round of storms, but further south in the Puget Sound area, it's a MESS.

My friend, who owns a "farmlet" about 45 miles south of here, has downed trees littering her property, no power for the 2nd time in two weeks; a 15-YO neighbor boy went out to spread hay for his horse and a tree fell on him and broke his pelvis. Those are the stories that make one wonder...

People are encouraged to stay home! The roads are clogged with downed trees and broken branches and vehicles are running out of fuel trying to get from Point A to point B -- and many gas stations are closed because there is no power to pump fuel. STAY HOME!!!!

DEN said...

Didn't miss you by much! 45 miles isn't far in global terms.

I thought you folks just got nonstop rain in the winter.

I think it is part of the global warming issue. Less moisture in the planets air lets the moisture that is there get pretty wound up, like the tornado's this year and the hurricanes last year.

David B. Benson said...

Wow! Day before yesterday the Chinook had blown in rain and we received our share. Then night before last, at 2:35 am, the wind suddenly blew, gusting to 88 mph, and knocked out the electrical power for about 3/4 of a hour. (But some neighbors were without power for 7 hours or so.)

Trees fell on cars and house trailers, etc. I slept through it all...

Last night, about 7--8 pm, the utility crews were through my neighborhood cleaning away branches, etc. Strange to see their spotlights.

This morning the telephone company was out replacing a split telephone pole.

Now THAT was a Chinook!

Bill said...

Global Hydrology and Climate Center

DEN said...

Bill, thanks for the great link!

DEN said...

David, you got it too? Strange indeed.
Cold blast of air coming out of the Gulf of Alaska, it's warmer in Detroit!

Hey Erling, come get your cold air! We are not used to this chilly stuff, supposed to be 0 degreesF at Tahoe in a day or two!

David B. Benson said...

den --- News sources claim it was the worst since 1993 Jan 20. Anyway, it blew away all the warm and now it is getting colder and colder and colder as the day progresses...