Friday, September 21, 2007

Friday Funnies


(scroll down)


Slowpoke by Jen Sorensen

by August J. Pollak

Slowpoke by Jen Sorensen

Thanks Alan!

For those of you that have cats, Go here, The sounds will send your kitties through the roof, great for the office too or just to irritate relatives.



DEN said...

One sour note this AM.

Yahoo headline: 400 richest Americans

"For the first time, it takes more than a billion to make Forbes' wealthiest list".

I vote we find the 400 POOREST Americans and put their names on a list and send it to every news media outlet, while they are counting the rich, the poor are dying in the streets of America.

Now thats a story!

DEN said...

"At a John Kerry speech at the University of Florida, a student was asking the senator so many annoying questions that police tasered him. ... Of course, people in Washington were stunned by this. What? John Kerry's still giving speeches?" --Jay Leno

"While the cops had him down, did you hear what he yelled to the police? He was yelling ... 'Don't tase me bro.' You know something, any time a white guy says the word 'bro,' he deserves to get tasered." --Jay Leno

"O.J. Simpson was released on bail today. ... O.J. was charged with two counts of robbery with a deadly weapon. The deadly weapon, of course, was O.J." --Jay Leno

"When the cops arrested O.J., they found him at the blackjack table trying to play the race card." --Jay Leno

"Tourists are flocking to Minneapolis to the bathroom where Senator Larry Craig was arrested. It's like a tourist attraction. People are actually going to the airport now to see it. In fact, today Senator Craig called it 'The Happiest Place On Earth.' They have a sign at the door: 'Your stance must be this wide to get in.'" --Jay Leno

"Former President Bill Clinton was in town last night. He was giving a speech at the home of a wealthy campaign contributor in Brentwood when the power went out. ... L.A. Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa was there too. Embarrassing moment -- when the lights came back on ... both of them had their hand on the same woman's ass." --Jay Leno

"CNN's Lou Dobbs will be off the air for two weeks after a tonsillectomy. I thought this was kind of mean. While he is recovering, CNN replaced him with an illegal immigrant." --Jay Leno

DEN said...

"O.J. Simpson's lawyer objected to O.J. being held without bail. He said if he was anyone besides O.J., he would have been released by now. If he was anyone but O.J., he'd be serving life for double murder right now." --Jay Leno

"In political news, Vice President Dick Cheney is very upset about the way General Petraeus has been treated by the Democrats. Vice President Cheney said it is horrible that people mock and insult a soldier. I'll be sure to pass that on to John Kerry when I see him." --Jay Leno

"Speaking of John Kerry, a University of Florida student was tasered after asking John Kerry about the 2004 election. ... I believe this is the first time anyone's ever been electrified at a John Kerry speech." --Jay Leno

"You probably saw the footage on the news. In fact, John Kerry was so shocked when it happened, he almost showed a facial expression." --Jay Leno

"Actually, to his credit, John Kerry said he did not want the kid tasered. He figured if he would just keep talking for a few more minutes, the student would have nodded off on his own." --Jay Leno

"In a new book, former Mexican President Vicente Fox says George W. Bush's Spanish is at best grade school level. Unfortunately, so is his History, Math, Science." --Jay Leno

"President Bush has tapped retired federal judge Michael Mukasey ... to replace Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. Conservatives in Washington say Mukasey is a real 'law and order' guy. To which Bush said, 'He was on that TV show, too?'" --Jay Leno

"The airport bathroom in Minneapolis where ... Senator Larry Craig was arrested has become a tourist attraction. ... Isn't that unbelievable? See, when I travel, I like to go to the men's rooms that the locals use, not some tourist trap" --Jay Leno

DEN said...

Yea OK I like Jay Leno, he is a 'car guy'.

micki said...

Den -- when I first met Bill he was producing a mini-doc for ABC News on Vietnam soldiers on R&R in Hawaii.

A Navy buddy of Bill's who was a lieutenant stationed in Hawaii (before going to Vietnam), hoped that one day he'd make $10,000 a year!

Dave was a bright guy from Big Spring, Texas, who thought (at that time) that $10,000 a year was a fortune!

Boy, does that date me??? Or what? And Dave, too!

micki said...

See y'all in a week or so.


DEN said...

Micki, where ya going?

Gerald said...

I try to post some thoughts in both DWF and AR. Today, AR has received several of my posts. Today was quite a day for me. My Pope, Pope Benedict, refused to see M. C. or Mushroom Cloud Rice. There are days when the cockles of my heart are warmed. Finally, the Pope may have decided not to see a member of Hitler Bush's murdering war machine and give these murdering scurvy rats credibility.

DEN said...

Gerald, your Pope needs to come out and condemn the entire administration for war crimes, that would perk up more than one Catholics' ears.

DEN said...

@ WAPO: The data provided by Gen. Petraeus on sharply declining Iraqi casualty rates is certainly open to analysis, debate, and challenge. We plan to take a closer look at them in a future post. However, does not provide adequate factual support for its larger assertion that Petraeus is "constantly at war with the facts" and is "cooking the books" for the White House. In the absence of fresh evidence, we award three Pinocchios.

3-ass on fire

Move On and their waste of money and newspaper, UGH!

Used to call it, shooting oneself in the foot.

Gerald said...

DEN, I cannot speak how vocal Pope Benedict has been on the Iraq war but I know that John Paul II was very vocal against the Iraq war by saying it is a wrong and an immoral war. The Catholic bishops in Nazi America have been too silent on this wrong and immoral war. G. K. Chesterton has also said that it's not that Christianity has been tried and failed. It's that it has never been tried.

The Catholic Church in the various countries are given some latitude in voicing their thoughts on a wide range of issues.

Until the Catholic Church in Nazi America locates her moral compass, there will be defections from Catholicism. G. K. Chesterton, as you will recall, had said that the greatest stumbling blocs for Catholicism are Catholics. This statement is a truism.

Gerald said...

DEN, I believe that there is more said behind the scene than we realize. I do agree the Pope must be not just vocal but he must speak passionately against wars.

Catholics who favor injustice and murder against God's children should be unable to receive the sacraments.

DEN said...

The very cornerstone of the Catholic religion is to preserve life.

Just as they speak out against abortion they should be just as adamantly against war.

DEN said...

I need to go play in traffic.

Hold down the fort.

David B. Benson said...

Why, Den? Is it going to blow away?


DEN said...

Have to keep the fort from falling into enemy hands.

DEN said...

I do believe they have all gone completely mad.

ò¿óarol said...

Phew, I can't believe it! Your first post about the richest 400 Americans, Den, made me chuckle. When I saw that list I had the very same thought, but then I chucked it. Do you know how many poor people there are??? How the heck could one find the poorest?

My second thought was how SICK I am of the top 400 list. You know why? IT'S BECAUSE OF HOW THEY GOT THAT WAY!!! On our backs! The lousy bastards are only rich because of we lesser mortals. Lousy bastards and I for one am SICK OF THE FORBES LIST! Arghhhhhh.

DEN said...

Hey Carol, the googles lost your comment here, however I did get it my e-mail??!!

Thats what my comment referred to.

(them tubes must be clogged)

DEN said...

Old saying:

Eat the rich, there well fattened.

DEN said...

wrong their, duh

º¿carol said...

What do you mean my comment was lost? I see it sitting there.

º¿carol said...

Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Posted by Jim Hightower

Good grief! What is it about corporate Democrats that make them such meek and weak Democrats?

Oh, yeah… I guess it’s that corporate yoke they wear.

Take the party’s present front-runner for president, Sen. Hillary Clinton. Facing a hobbled and dispirited Republican opposition, she has a chance to stand forthright for America’s workaday majority, to rally ordinary folks to take their county back from the moneyed elites, and to move America forward with a bold vision of grassroots economics.

So, who has she turned to for an economic braintrust? Wall Street! Business Week magazine reports that a handful of investment bankers are meeting regularly to “refine” Clinton’s position on key economic issues.

This might explain the senator’s recent major policy speech in which she essentially promised to be a milquetoast, don’t rock-the-boat, cautious insider if she gets elected. She pledged to “work within the system” and to make “principled compromises.” Wow. That’ll really excite America’s hard-hit working stiffs, won’t it? Those are Republican-lite code words to reassure Wall Street – not to launch a resurgence of democratic progress.

Bizarrly, Clinton cited FDR and LBJ as her models of political pragmatism and accommodation. “They got big things done,” she declared, “because they knew it wasn’t just about the dream, it was about the results.”

Actually, no. They got big things done because they dared to dream big, dared to go right to the people with their big dreams… and dared to take on the power elites to realize those dreams. In fact, Roosevelt earned the bitter enmity of Wall Street with his populist proposals. But instead of trying to appease the bankers and speculators by waving the flag of compromise, FDR said: “I welcome their hatred.”

Come on senator, come on Democrats – it’s time to be Democrats again!

“With a New Speech, Clinton Lays Out Goals as President,” The New York Times, September 3, 2007

“The Candidates On Wall Street,”, April 2, 2007

DEN said...

Carol, this is what I got in my mail:
carol has left a new comment on your post "Madder Than Hell....":

The yeas are the usual suspects.
obviously yesterday, just showed up today.

plugged tubes at the googles

©¿rol said...

Robert M. Gates made BuzzFlash Hypocrite of the Week. His second one. Jerk.

Dammit! I wonder why some links won't work when I HTML them!?!?! Here's one of them.

Anyone interested in reading it can copy/paste this link in their browser. Arghhhhh.

David B. Benson said...

Carol --- The link you posted is broken.

ô,ôarol said...

That's weird, Den It was a post from yesterday that just showed up?

Do you get an email every time someone posts here?

I'm registered to post on the Lansing paper and I can check a box on every article so I'm sent an email saying someone made a comment. Comes in REAL handy. Especially when I make a comment. :)

ô,ôarol said...

I know, Doc. That's why I put the link in the bottom of that post. Some sites won't let me HTML them. Makes me mad!!!

•c•arol said...

Den, were you talking about this post?

carol said...

The yeas are the usual suspects.

9/21/2007 5:34 PM

That's because I just made it even though it was a dead thread. :)

DEN said...

Ole hill is part of the system, another plugin candidate to ensure the 'status quo' keeps moving.

In another way she is a return to the 'clinton days' with a twist.

A statesman is needed for that job after the mess is made. Risky runny a gal in these twisted times.

If most folks feel more secure with a man, the chances of winning the election are diminished and a closer margin of votes 'allowing for errors' to sway the reich way.

We know what thats like.

We need new blood in Congress, retire out the old farts.

Kick the dust off and patch up the Constitution.

Truth is more valuable than gold

©A®OL said...

Hillary is my LAST choice to run. I cannot believe she's going to be the one! My god, she stands to ruin the whole thing. So many people hate her, that's one thing. The other is the hugging of the middle ground....just like old Bill.

Don't get me wrong, I liked Bill. Voted for him twice but I HATED how he tried to please everyone by trying to be Mr. Middle man. She's doing the same damn thing and I don't like it. We need change. REAL change and she's the same old, same old.

If I could wiggle my nose like Samantha Dennis Kucinich would win. He is the ONLY one whose plan for health care is national...all the insurance companies pushed aside. That's the answer here and absolutely every dem running will not squeeze out the companies that have ruined everything.

DEN said...

I can't believe with her plan we have to 'buy' insurance. HUH?

Why not run it through the the already in place medicare system?

Give insurance companies the boot, we do not need a middleman.

Get the best heads together to make it run right with taxpayer dollars.

A healthy tax payer is far better than a sick one so it would behoove
the feds to keep everyone healthy.

ER visits cost taxpayers a fortune when the sick cannot pay.

It is the insurance lobby that needs to take a hike and take their duck with them.

DEN said...

For a Buckeye DK is great, however, he does not have big money, he will not win.

Big money will win this election.

Money whores rule this country.

DK is a real person, not some stooge for the big money boys.

Gravel for VP

If not, it will be BOHICA time again.

DEN said...


Gerald said...

DEN, here is more info on my Pope getting it right.

Pope refuses to meet with Mushroom Cloud

Gerald said...

Christian Rights

There are at least two reasons why Pope Benedict may have decided peremptorily against a private meeting with Ms Rice.

First, it was Ms Rice who just before the outbreak of the Iraq war in March 2003 made it clear to a special papal envoy sent from Rome, Cardinal Pio Laghi, that the Bush administration was not interested in the views of the late Pope on the immorality of launching its planned military offensive.

Secondly, the US has responded in a manner considered unacceptable at the Vatican to the protection of the rights of Iraqi Christians under the new Iraqi constitution.

So Hitler Bush was not interested in the late Pope's views that the planned military offensive against Iraq was immoral. Wow!!! Hitler Bush, I guess, is the decider on what is moral and what is immoral. Here we have the greatest numbnuts to sit in the Oval Office deciding on what is moral. I guess his take on torture is moral, too. We have a numbnuts for emperor.